Fiona Fae: A Natural Birth Story

*Just a disclaimer that this is an in depth description of my pregnancy and birth of my daughter and I do talk a lot about the procedures. Although I do not go into any graphic detail I still suggest that if you are not comfortable with that or you have any triggers, to avoid this article*

(I do a lot of comparing to my sons pregnancy in this post so I've italicized the sections where I'm talking about his birth so it doesn't get too confusing)

Where do you generally start with a birth story? I guess Fiona's started back in January when I had my second ever miscarriage. It's hard to want to try again after that happens, it just really makes you think that maybe your body isn't ready, adequate, and in my case I thought maybe I wasn't fit and healthy enough?? Those are definitely not true thoughts but they ran through my head and gave me doubts anyway. Well I had my son and he was perfectly healthy and happy so I knew I could do it again and love any baby that came our way. We became pregnant with Fiona almost immediately after we started trying again and yes even though I was trying to be positive about it I still was very cautious of my feelings for the first 12 weeks which was hard because it kept me from being excited. After 2 or 3 ultrasounds and several chances to hear her heartbeat, I finally became very excited and let myself start wondering what the gender of this baby would be.

I think I really knew it was a girl but once again I didn't want to be disappointed so I didn't let myself get too attached to the idea. We had our 20 week ultrasound and the tech said she was 85% sure it was a girl

85%?? Well that wasn't enough to convince me haha!! I told a couple of people but since at the ultrasound she wasn't fully cooperating and they couldn't get a full scan of her brain and heart they scheduled another ultrasound a few days later and again we were told it's a girl but they weren't 100% sure! Well I had a gender reveal to plan so that would have to do! Haha! You know I plan my life around parties!!

We made my whole family come and wait around to see if Drew would have a brother or a sister. With a crazy windy day and a shotty piñata I made (and recruited my sister in laws to help me finish even though they didn't know what was inside) I had my friend Sariah take pictures as we unveiled we were expecting a GIRL! Everyone was so excited for us and most everyone guessed that it would be a girl.

My amazing sister threw me a surprise baby shower and I had a casual shower with my awesome friends after that. Fiona was so spoiled before she even came! So many pink things!!! I'm obsessed for sure!

Well at my 36 week appointment they checked to see what direction she was facing and it turns out she was breech. Drew wasn't breech that late in the pregnancy so I didn't have to worry about it before and I didn't know what to expect. My midwives offered me a procedure to turn her around but there were some risks to it. Both me and Chris left that appointment concerned but also had a strong feeling we shouldn't rush into any treatments and wait it out. It was concerning to me because I had planned an all natural birth and if she stayed breech I would have to have a c-section. So, I tried a few different things like yoga poses, exercise ball moves and my mom told me that if you lay upside down on an ironing board propped up on the couch, put a bag of peas near the baby's head and play music near her feet she would turn. Well as silly as it looked I tried that a few times and couldn't tell if anything happened or not. My next appointment she was still breech and once again they tried to talk me into the procedure and once again both me and Chris felt we should wait. At 39 weeks we went in and sure enough she had turned on her own!

At 38 weeks I was measuring at 4cm and 70% effaced. That wasn't very surprising to me because I was that same number with Drew at 36 weeks but still didn't have him until 40 weeks on his due date. So I had little to no expectations in the next two weeks.

One day during week 38 I was in Target checking out and I started getting some very strong and consistent contractions. I called my husband to let him know what was going on and we thought we were ready to go to the hospital. I called the on call midwife and she told me to go home drink water and lay down to see if they would continue. I did as instructed and they actually went away and I slept the whole night. I had a few more Braxton Hicks after that but none were even close to that strong or consistent.

Well, finally her due date came. I went to the temple with my sister that morning, who had come home from her mission just two days before (I was so glad baby waited for her to come home so I could greet her at the airport!), and yes I was a little nervous I was going to go into labor there but we came and left with no contractions or signs. I had an appointment that day and the midwife stripped my membranes and told me I could be in active labor by the end of the day especially since I was dilated to a 4+. The day came and went and I had nothing. Just uncomfortableness from having my membranes stripped.

At the end of the day I will admit I was pretty disappointed there was no baby in my arms. My son came on his due date and I was so hopeful miss Fiona would too but alas, no baby magically appeared before midnight.

The next morning around 8:30 I had a nice hot shower and as soon as I turned off the water I had one intense contraction come on. I went to go get dressed and another one came. My husband was about to leave for work but I asked him to hang around for another few minutes. I started timing them with an app and they were coming every 3-5 minutes and were not letting up! My husband figured out a way to blow off work and we all packed up and went to the hospital. When I got there they checked me and I was dilated to a six and my contractions were still coming. They were kind of pleasant contractions. I know that sounds weird. They were strong but oddly satisfying. My body knew what it was doing and working hard at it!

With my first born my water broke before labor started so I didn't have these types of contractions for long before the real intense ones came along. I got all the way to a 9 before I had an epidural so I was certain I could get through that stage again and go all natural with this baby and that was my plan all along.

Well at 1:30 they decided it was time to break my water to really get things moving and my midwife was confident that it would happen really quickly after that and boy was she right! For the next 2 hours I was on my hands and knees with incredibly intense and PAINFUL contractions. I remember I kept saying "I can't" and I was assured by everyone around me that "I can!" even though I was just trying to say "I can't breathe!"

the contractions were so close together and so intense I couldn't get a second to really breathe and concentrate. I know at one point I asked if it was too late for the epidural haha!! It clearly was far past that opportunity!!

Around 3pm she started crowning and I FELT it! Have you ever heard of the "ring of fire"? Well it is a real thing and that's all I could feel the entire time I was pushing. It was so painful but I actually was motivated and could breathe in between contractions now so I just pushed and pushed - still on my hands and knees - until I heard everyone say her head was out! I felt her shoulders come and she started crying the second she was all the way out. Such a relief to hear that since I couldn't see! They handed me my baby through my legs, which was so strange but cool, and help me turn around so I could hold her. I held her for a little bit but started uncontrollably shaking. I had experienced this with my son but it was before he came and because of my epidural. I was so confused this time because I didn't have an epidural I didn't know why I was shaking so much. The nurses told me it was pure adrenaline! My body had gone through so much it was still full of intense energy!

She was a beautiful color after a few minutes but in the lighting to me she looked blue so I was asking everyone if she was okay over and over and finally after everyone reassured me she was fine I believed them.

I had quite a few tears and the stitching took a while but then I finally calmed down and was able to hold my baby and relax and soak it all in.

My husband commented that he couldn't believe how alert I was for the rest of the day. I think the adrenaline took a good 24 hours to fully calm down because I didn't sleep much that night and even well into the next day I was still pretty alert. I really enjoyed having that energy for sure!

We stayed in the hospital for the 3 days until the pediatrician gave us the go ahead to go home. Because I tested positive for group b strep they had to keep an eye on her for 48 hours.

Also, my husband went to get Drew's infant car seat and since it was in storage in our garage for so long it had spiders and other scary things in it so he had to go buy a car seat that same day. So basically I was stuck at the hospital until we could install a new car seat haha!

We are so lucky and blessed to have Fiona in our lives and I wouldn't have survived the first few weeks without the amazing women in my life plus more I had never even met before! I am going to save a whole post for them because truly we have been incredibly blessed by the service of others!

Thank you to everyone who has reached out and helped us along this journey. Love you!